That 'Special Someone'

You know, guys tend to be a really heavy topic on my mind a lot of the time. And I'm pretty positive that I'm not the only one...and I always wonder how guys can feel like girls are the complicated ones. I mean sure, girls are capable of emotions and most girls cause themselves more drama then they can ever handle, but they're the ones who make us think they're going to 'make a move' and then never do. Or they act one way around you, but by the time next week rolls around, they're a completely different person, which makes you wonder if they were ever interested in you at all...
Girls have standards for guys, sure...but in the end, how many of them really matter? I mean I'd love to get a guy who will actually listen to me when I talk to them, someone who can love me (even on my off days), someone who's handsome, can make me laugh, can make me fall for them over and over again by being sweet and romantic, and enjoys a lot of the same things that I enjoy myself.
But maybe in the future, those 'expectations' won't matter because when you find the one you're supposed to be with, maybe they're completely different from who you thought they would be. However, you shouldn't fight against that...you should be happy that there's someone that's meant to be with you.
I gotta say, one of the reasons I really hate movies, is they always have the same kind of romance in it. Either, the guy likes the girl but the girl doesn't like him, but in the end they'll fall in love. Or there's a couple that gets into some kind of argument or predicament and ends up saying,"I'm not gonna be with you anymore!" But then in the next thirty minutes, they're back together. Then again, they are movies...but they do make you wonder. Will love be like how it is in the movies? Will it be better? Will it be completely different? Will there be a 'fairytale' ending to the story? I know I think too much...but this has been on my mind for a really long time, so I decided to blog about it.
I've prayed to God, asking Him if there's someone out there for me. And I've prayed about whether or not I'm even ready for a relationship or not. So far, I haven't gotten much...so I'm assuming it's not something I really need to be worrying about right now in my time of life...but I still can't help but wonder about things. Like how (at least in every relationship I've been in) when you're with someone, it's going great, but then someone gets doubts about things...and from there it just goes downhill. When do you find out they're the one worth fighting for? Or that they're going to fight to keep you, too? I mean, when is it really worth it?


This is what I've come up with:
First of all, just because you don't find that 'special someone' in Highschool or College, doesn't mean that it's the end of the world. 'There's plenty of fish in the sea,' as some might say. But seriously, most Highschool relationships don't last anyways, so why worry about them when there's so much more you could be focusing on? Besides, it gets rid of so much unwanted drama for so many people that just make lives complicated, and nobody likes that.
Second of all, God has a plan. For you, for me, for everyone. He knows when that special person will walk into our lives, and when the time is right, we'll know when we're supposed to be worrying about it, God will make sure of that.
And finally, I think when someone is worth fighting for, you'll know, because they're willing to fight for you in return.

Light the World on Fire

At church on Saturday, everyone was told to 'Light the World on Fire.' To spread God around the world, to receive an encounter with God, become an encounter, and share that encounter with someone else. And a Hebrew word was used that's stuck with me. The Hebrew word for receive is nah'al and when I searched this word up online I got several different results...
to lead or guide to a watering place, bring to a place of rest, refresh
Fighting Pioneer Youth
and what the Pastor said was,"Grasping onto something, taking hold of something..." and I guess all of the definitions make sense...when you're on fire for God, it's not like anything else. It's new...it's peaceful and refreshing...and when you're with God, you're a child at heart: Someone who can freely love, without really thinking about it. And as a child of God, we're fighting to spread Him around, to ignite the rest of the world on fire...to kindle the fire.


To me, Lighting the World on Fire means letting the Holy Spirit work through you, so others can see who Christ is through you...spreading the flame of God all throughout the world...And from there, hopefully it can be spread by them, too. Many a time, people will be on fire for God...but they'll be so into the moment, they'll forget that what people need most is God...He should be shared so that others can feel the most amazing things that you do. So that His love can be spread all over the world; the love so amazing that it sets people's souls on fire for Him. I don't know about you, but I think that's some pretty amazing stuff.
So yeah, it's great to experience God, nothing else is like it. But what about those other people that are in the world that need to experience Him too? He needs to be shared, spread, shown to everyone, because everyone deserves to feel His love.

My Life: Take 2

I feel like I'm transformed every day. I'm learning and growing just like everyone else out there, and I'm learning to trust God more, let Him take control of my life because I certainly don't know what I'm doing when I take the lead...
For the longest time, I felt...alone...lost...trapped in the Wilderness. I felt like I was leaning on God but in a way I knew that it felt like I was giving it too much effort, and then I KNEW I wasn't giving everything up to God. I was too focused on giving things up myself, rather than doing it...it kinda defeated the whole purpose in the first place. I felt lost for a really long time...especially after I lost my best friend...but I knew it was just another bump in the road. I had to climb over it eventually.
I prayed to God and I begged to God to tell me what to do, to give me a sign, send me on the right path again...
After awhile (because you can't always get what you want right away), I felt like I should go back to the Friday-night Youthgroup because I knew I could really feel God whenever I was there praying to Him or just lying on my back in worship. The location for the Youthgroup had changed and my friend told me it was moved to a place called 'Joyland' and I thought,"Hmm...Joyland...sounds kind of interesting..." Well, when I went back, the people who were involved were as welcoming as always (which is probably one of the greatest aspects of the Youthgroup...how much love everyone shows for each other) and I continually started going again. While I was there, I really felt like I belonged, like I could talk about whatever to whoever and it would be kept in complete secrecy. I got drunk in the Holy Spirit for the first time and it's the greatest feeling in the world; it's completely overwhelming and it's PURE JOY.
From Youthgroup I was invited to go to Bible study on Saturday, and I thought maybe I would, maybe I wouldn't...
That Saturday, I woke up late, forgetting about the Bible study and I kinda figured I just wouldn't go; I still had to get ready, get directions, etc. But something was tugging at my gut and telling me to go. So, somehow, I pulled myself together and got to the the Bible study on time and it was the first Bible study I had gone to where I actually learned anything. Afterwards, people were talking about going to church and I had been invited before but I'm gonna be honest, I wasn't really interested in going to a different church; I already had one. But I remember I was sitting there thinking I'd probably just go home and do something pointless like watch TV but again, something was nudging me and I specifically remember thinking,"I could go home, or I could worship my Lord." and just at that moment, someone turned to me and asked,"Are you going to Church?" and I replied,"Yeah. I think I am."
I can most definitely say that going to Joyland is such a unique experience every time I go. Every moment is spent with my Saviour, and it's the weekends that I look forward to because of that. I can spend so much time with my God and not feel ashamed of anything, feel accepted, like it's where I belong. I'm not alone. God answered my prayers. I also find it incredible that after I leave Joyland, I can remain happy for endless amounts of time, and the most amazing thing is...I'm always hungry for more.